tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69466427945555477642024-03-05T11:01:00.736-05:00Outskirted.....-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.comBlogger87125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-77756439589837014782016-02-10T12:50:00.000-05:002016-02-29T12:03:43.941-05:00I before E except after C?<style>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHNoVhrWsll5OSfpbaeMzDFSg0ywVBZLJQztzuzO5ht6BYPu0HXdDmGk-xiO2xORNEnjeeYaeDJ2mMX5meTCZHlwS1v-AtRuneqUQJ6nTQ1Sh04-5Zn1C1H_4ypK4GsawykgJ2NMn55a4/s1600/th-8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHNoVhrWsll5OSfpbaeMzDFSg0ywVBZLJQztzuzO5ht6BYPu0HXdDmGk-xiO2xORNEnjeeYaeDJ2mMX5meTCZHlwS1v-AtRuneqUQJ6nTQ1Sh04-5Zn1C1H_4ypK4GsawykgJ2NMn55a4/s1600/th-8.jpg" /></a>She was right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I never was an intimate
friend of hers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had become
friendly after a sea change in me in my Senior year of high school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had gotten into a competitive college
and I let loose a bit from the quiet studious kid others had known through my
preceding 3 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We joked a bit,
wrote some ridiculous school play, and I even got invited to my first high
school party at her house April of my senior year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That summer we hung around a bit too, her at her vacation
home and I at the house my parents bought to escape the city.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I remember a particular night, coming down from the city and
sitting in the back of her boyfriend’s Pontiac convertible going 80 on the
parkway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ah, to be 17 again.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We parted ways, her off to a traditional women’s college in
the East and I to the Midwest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
had some further communication the next summer doing what Jersey Shore girls do
best after a year of college under their belts:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>going to the beach by daylight, working at night, then bars
and boyfriends on the weekends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ah,
to have the drinking age at 18 again. (Yikes , I have children that age!)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I didn’t hear from her again for decades.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would hear little bits of news
through alumni newsletters and a smattering of friends.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She spent nearly 15 years in Italy,
married and had a son.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She returned
to the US and became a schoolteacher like her mother. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I had heard several years ago that she had opened a Thrift
store.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perfect, I thought as my
father had just passed away and I had an entire household to dispose of.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I contacted her, we spoke on the phone
and I travelled to near Philadelphia to reconnect and to see if she could use
any of my late Dad’s stuff.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We had a pleasant catch up (bitch?) session at a lovely
sandwich shop.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But the first
indication that something was wrong was the sparkling water.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Odd that an innocent order would in a
sense “spark” such concern.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She ordered a particular brand asking its origin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When the teenage waitress said she
didn’t really know, my friend lambasted her about not knowing her products and
how did she get the job there anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
If I could have run, I would
have. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I tried to tell my friend to please “let it go,”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>but she launched into a speech about
the sparkling waters of Italy and how Italian wait staff know their products. I
politely excused myself by saying, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“I never drink the stuff,” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>to which she inferred that I was some sort of yokel.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She went down from there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I opened up about my own particular hell that I was going
through and she did too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
The difference was that hers was
much worse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Over the course of the next few months, and the words of
George <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>W. Bush, I did the “google.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sometimes my investigative skills
backfire.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I found information I
wish I could unsee.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Years passed and I heard from her again but this time she
asked me for money.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I contacted
her family this time to get a better understanding.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Again, I wish I could unhear now.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She was bright, very Intelligent, but totally
lacking the Emotional intelligence of a truly mature and mentally stable
person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had the I before
the E from what I had C-een.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal">
My last email to her was begging her to get the help she needed. She has since blocked me. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">Some say your 50's are a decade of loss. Death is not the only loss.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">We lose many to mental illness too.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-29777483758585981322015-12-27T23:55:00.000-05:002016-02-10T12:54:13.632-05:00Cautionary Tails<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Every day I look for her obituary. But now I fully expect
there will be none.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It has been a
month and one half since her death yet I can’t forget it. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She was my academic rival in grammar school. We had first
met when she moved into my neighborhood, actually across the street.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We were kindergarten friends with her
even attending my fifth birthday party held in the back room of my parents
apartment. We started first grade together, sharing Sr. Barbara’s kind words to
encourage reading and third grade listening to Mrs. Gizzi’s war stories of her various surgeries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She even showed me her glass eye in the
palm of her hand. ( She had a retinoblastoma as an infant) Either she or I were
the last ones standing after Sr. Gabriel’s “Math Games” where girls were called
to stand in the front of the class by a frail old nun with a wicked laugh. “How
do you spell “ISOSCELES” L?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“What
is a PARALLELOGRAM” J?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“ The
formula for the area of a RHOMBUS”? The questions only stopped with the last
man standing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
While I enjoyed it, I never quite sensed the terror in my
fellow students eyes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
L went onto the corresponding high school of my grammar
school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had won the coveted
scholarship by scoring 0.2 higher on the qualifying exam.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I in turn went to another slightly more
traditional high school just four blocks away. We had nonetheless kept in touch
through mutual friends and going to school dances at local boys high schools.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She stayed local after high school whereas I left to find
the midwest and the world.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She stayed even more local following the tradition of young
adults in my city, living in NJ while working in NY, not unlike previous
generations.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She experienced privilege.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her parents won a Million dollar lottery in NJ.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yet like most lottery winners, their
fate was far from luck. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"></span>Her father
died soon thereafter and she and her mother fought viciously over the money,
eventually suing each other.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I remember going to a mutual friend’s wedding and seeing L
for the first time in years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her
face was hardened, steely and her attitude cold. She was stick thin. She was a
bridesmaid and her walk up the aisle a swagger and her glaze daggers. She
didn’t even glance at her mother seated alone in the back row, but if she had, her stare would have cut deeply.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Year went by.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Marriages, children, houses, etc.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>L and I went our ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
was still living in Chicago when I heard of her diagnosis. Hearing someone had
AIDS in 1992 was not a good thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It didn’t hold the promise of a chronic manageable disease it does now. Some
hot shot stock trading boyfriend she had. A Bright Lights, Big City story that
was a typical as moussed big hair in the late 1980’s. I remember mourning in a
way. I would send her Christmas cards from that point on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I guess I was trying to say that I was
out there still thinking of her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>They were never reciprocated.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I would hear about her from time to time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her mother had passed away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She bought a 5 bedroom house in a tony
suburb.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Friends had helped her
with that house, but she never helped them. There is only so much giving and not
receiving a friendship can take.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I contacted her in earnest in 2010 for a mini Grammar school
reunion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I went to see her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Words could not describe her condition.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her house was in shambles, her dog, a
large bull dog was as obese as she was thin. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My heart sank in disbelief.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I tried to be encouraging.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried to help her understand that there were programs out
there for her and her medical needs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That she should reconnect with others, especially at the reunion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People understand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>People generally like to help. Hope is
allowed. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I left her with the blunt words “Please L, you need to
come.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She never showed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I got the drunkest I have been in a while, a combination of not eating
and enjoying reconnecting with people I hadn’t seen in 35 years.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I called her the following week. “You missed a good show, L,
I was plastered and even threw up the next morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>AM was mortified.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She laughed but never fully explained why she didn’t show.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I saw her once more in 2012.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was stuck on the NJ turnpike, near the exit for her
suburb.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was alone and for many
reasons didn't want to rush home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Hey
L I am in the area, mind if I stop in?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I arrived at the house that was even in more disarray that the previous
year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“L you need help.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I am nervous I am even more blunt
than usual: “You need to get out of here.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She explained that she was unemployed now, not getting her
meds and had trouble with her remaining vision.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her words were punctuated by her now obsession with her dog
who had grown even more obese.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She was concerned about her house. I tried to console, help
and encourage as best I can, yet it doesn’t always come out that way: my
parting words:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Fuck this house,
burn it down, for chrissakes, it’s just a house.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I never saw her again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Phone calls were never returned. Christmas cards were sent but never
reciprocated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Facebook birthday
wishes were only answered with<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>thumbs up message.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She only
posted about lost dogs on Facebook. They were cautionary tails. They were not the only ones who were lost.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She died alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She was found after four days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her dog was with her. I last heard her veterinarian had taken him in.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She had the world at her feet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was bright. She had loving parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had good friends. She was educated.
She had money.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But it was never
enough.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In the end she reaped nothing
because she sowed nothing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
Holidays are supposed to be festive, colorful and a family
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can not help but to think
of L today now that Christmas is over. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Every year for the past 20+ or so I send a mutual friend of
L’s and I a Christmas ornament.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
am not even sure how it started.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
try to be relevant.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The year she
took her family for a European tour, I sent an glass ornament of multiple
suitcases. It’s a silly tradition but it became more necessary this year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Her friendship is one I never want to
forget.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I send the crappy
ornaments to connect, to remember and to be remembered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">I have also known her since kindergarten.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My friend understands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
L never did. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
May she finally rest in peace.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-68083055807029484342015-03-14T15:09:00.000-04:002015-03-14T16:27:05.390-04:00The Gong Show 101<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjDhDdYIefWEX_MrpDwx2BLB4DTJ_H-lOFnTRBHL153L4RqFq_3azwYbkQk5eVhu5oEj-kWvpYUSOcUhBSR7LKnH7iK1as5Rflk6d4AEiq759bb0Hf72LJbqrBCwVYo8fav5YiEfM9mXs/s1600/th-7.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjDhDdYIefWEX_MrpDwx2BLB4DTJ_H-lOFnTRBHL153L4RqFq_3azwYbkQk5eVhu5oEj-kWvpYUSOcUhBSR7LKnH7iK1as5Rflk6d4AEiq759bb0Hf72LJbqrBCwVYo8fav5YiEfM9mXs/s1600/th-7.jpeg" /></a>As a child I was a television addict.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There was no “I Love Lucy”, “I Dream of
Jeannie” or “Little Rascal” rerun that I didn’t watch.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Summer
Time and the TV was easy….</i><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My parents were not financially set enough nor insightful enough to compulsively
plan day camps, internships, sleep away camps or classes for us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My urban neighborhood was my camp and
don’t come home until the street lamps were lit.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
One of those shows was The Gong Show- an outrageous,
slapstick of a contest where contestants vied for ridiculous prizes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Hosted by Chuck Barris, a dry, short
ethnic guy who was the antithesis of the plastic Mitt Romney –type TV game show
hosts.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Whenever my Mother saw us watching that show she would yell,
“Get that crap off.” “I don’t want you to watch that.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“He’s dirty.” “I don’t get this.” You knew she was serious when she would get up ( no remote in those days), leaving the ever present burning cigarette behind, and physically turn off the TV.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was one of those things that you knew would irk your
mother so you did it anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There
were many things in my armamentarium and The Gong Show was just one.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But what I did to circumvent her was a valuable lesson in
growing up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She was my obstacle in
watching something I really thought was funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I simply went upstairs to watch it in my sister’s room. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
No harm no foul.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>My mom was not always right. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An early lesson for an adolescent.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Children need to disobey their parents.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In a way, parents want them too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In small steps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Baby steps.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When there is still a safety net. Children need to know they
can step out of bounds and still play the game safely. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Some would argue vehemently that The Gong Show was
obscene.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Morally corrupt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I though it was just funny.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even the episode when Jaye P. Morgan pulled up her
shirt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Your couldn’t get more
outrageous on 1970’s daytime TV than that.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But I survived.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Laughed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mimicked Gene Gene
the Dancing Machine. Made a paper bag to ape the Unknown Comic. Did “The Worm.”
But then turned the TV off and went outside to catch butterflies with my best
friend Melanie.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was just TV.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<!--StartFragment-->
<!--EndFragment--><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Rest in peace Gene
Patton. You are the Dancing Machine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you for reminding me
NGC.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And please take a lesson from
this AHB. But baby steps, please. You will always have a safety net if you ask, but sometimes you have to ask. I am not always a mind reader.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-82980264214458040462015-02-13T15:45:00.000-05:002015-02-13T15:45:18.795-05:00The Reeducation of J*<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><i>*Or some things highly competitive or Ivy League institutions
do not teach you AND you were afraid to ask.</i></span><div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">1. Children do not come with instructions.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">2.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Depend on men soul-ly
not solely.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">3.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Trust your gut
flora.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">4.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Never, never
borrow money from friends -and it’s corollary -never let friends borrow money
from you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">5. Children are your biggest joy and biggest headache.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">6.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Dogs are 8<sup>th</sup>
wonders of the world.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">7.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Common sense and
IQ are inversely proportional.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">8.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A kind word, a
smile and a box of chocolate chip cookies are all worth their weight in gold.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">9. Yelling is to anxiety as expletives are to Paxil.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">10.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Analogies are no
longer on the SAT’s.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">11. </span>Clothes and
dishes do not wash themselves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">12. </span>A perfect house
is the sign of a diseased mind or a really good cleaning person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">13. </span>Die before you
get old.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">14. </span>Never pass up a
trip to New York City or Tijuana.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">15. Things can't be so bad if you can still laugh.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-48416437568334113252014-11-26T18:29:00.000-05:002014-11-29T11:40:02.006-05:00Keeping the Faith<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtKPGm3JGrV5RwjZfBgyQd_JWsCvraCP2R2V_Z4bw9PGkD34KX-_RGnZUN6mx0S87nqM1lly62mpgaIeMOHU72wSMXUR-x22LjsDzUAU6JbjYkJuR2IVGqf9kbb6heXXLeSgMTw-obk7M/s1600/th-1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtKPGm3JGrV5RwjZfBgyQd_JWsCvraCP2R2V_Z4bw9PGkD34KX-_RGnZUN6mx0S87nqM1lly62mpgaIeMOHU72wSMXUR-x22LjsDzUAU6JbjYkJuR2IVGqf9kbb6heXXLeSgMTw-obk7M/s1600/th-1.jpeg" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The venue had the gaudy elegance that was popular in the 60’s
and 70’s.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Gilded mirrors, crystal
chandeliers and even a grand marble staircase that lead to the cavernous dining
hall above. It was reminiscent of my late Aunt’s home where heavy chintzes
combined with flowery brocades.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
even had the old smell too. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It was 1975 again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Only I was not thirteen years old anymore.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I attended a fundraising gala for my old high school. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I had stepped back in time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My old neighbors were there, a physician’s family whose many
children had in turn become physicians themselves.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The daughter, who was being honored that night, was an
accomplished breast surgeon, accompanied by her plastic surgeon husband and her
internist brother.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There were nuns from my sister’s high school who politely
but vaguely remembered my last name. Chances are they remembered later that evening
all the trouble my sister had caused them as she rebelled against their Catholic
high school and wanted to graduate in 3 years. She was barely 16 at the
time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My parents thought she was
too young.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Conversely, she thought
she was too old for the white-gloved patent leather shoe nonsense.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They both won in a sense, she
eventually going to a much more highly ranked college and my parents had her home for one
more year. The war was ruthless however.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The collateral damage was that I went to the other Catholic
Girls High school just barely six blocks away, rupturing friendships that were
almost 9 years in the making.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
books replaced those friendships and I think to this day, I got the better
spoils of the battle between my parents and sister.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There were parents of friends who were extraordinarily
polite yet had aged so incredibly so. They were the “young” parents of my high
school set, but age is now so relative. Now they are now older and frailer. Not even I would be considered a young parent of a high schooler anymore.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The evening was <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>celebrated with typical benedictions and prayers that I can
recall only with prompting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even the
sign of the cross has become a odd gesture that I had to consciously think
about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I even ran into an old boyfriend there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In traditional fashion, his daughter
attends the same high school as her mother and both grandmothers combined.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“In my house it’s 1957,” he proudly and paternally boasted
as a throwback to the conventional values that persisted in that room, in that
parish, in that neighborhood, in that city. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And in 1957.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The Poppa! TRADITION! I could hear a fiddler in the background.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Strong-willed daughters will change that heart. They always do.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My parents made the right choice in 1975 having me attend
that high school.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was the best
choice they had at the time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The
public high schools may have had the basic academics but racial tensions were
still very high. My geographic high school had only two white students.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In contrast, my Catholic high school
had only 3 black students in a class of 114.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was white flight without the movers.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But as times
change, attitudes do so more slowly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Over</span> time, the city quietly assembled an Academic High School, even gave it
that name, and through much hard work it has become one of the best high school
in the state as well as the country. The city gentrified, improved, progressed
and finally took advantage of its proximity to<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Manhattan. I love going back now to new restaurants, the
amazing waterfront and a new vibrancy. And I do go geographically home from time to time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The most odd scenario of the evening was supposed to be its most engaging, yet it was its most telling.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The Chairman of the Gala greeted me at the door.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“”Maureen’ it’s nice to see you.”</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“Huh? What?”I <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>silently gasped. ( My name is not Maureen). I honestly did not know what to say. I was initially
upset that maybe the ravages of age had taken too horrible a toll. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am unrecognizable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Crap. I have aged, gained weight,
looked hagged, etc. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But that’s me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Always my fault. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mea Culpa.
</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Bless me father for I have……</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Not sinned! </span>It took
me days to realize I am glad she didn’t recognize me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have earned these lines, thicker waist and cropped
fingernails by doing things I love. I am raising three beautiful girls as their
father has moved a thousand miles away. I care for many patients that others would find
loathsome and unprofitable.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I dig gardens, refinish
furniture , write awful poetry and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>browse used book sales for old poetry. I am a dogged researcher and I have the bad eyesight to prove it. I cook.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I eat. I garden. I cook and eat what I garden. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> All </span>well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Perhaps too well. Oh well.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That lemon of a greeting became my hard (fought) lemonade.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have learned to finally make that too.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am not the
obedient, quiet Catholic girl that I once was. Hell, I even wore a plunging
dress.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And I even brought a date. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">No, I am not the same.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>No, I am not 17 anymore. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have seen the
world, lived the world, tasted the world, been educated in the world and have
progressed in the world.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Tom Wolfe famously said “ You can’t go home again.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I disagree.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You can, as this gala can attest.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But why would I want to?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Thank you SDA this
Thanksgiving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">You are still teaching
me valuable lessons about life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Only this lesson is that
you can leave it all behind.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-85571973793762342412014-09-03T23:46:00.000-04:002014-09-12T16:20:45.635-04:00Support Can be Beautiful<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTrfY0SvNZT9Lhwjr6Rvhsw2u7TQnu9wqK3l5eSAeq-U1VlCVV-hUUrh_ynrAc9kvROALFJ-0wA4eOLRlRXTz4pSbz41zQSkG9e3ixutEh2_fOsNO2dID3EJCOGS-s2ZjQtU1eoFtBx00/s1600/77bra004.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTrfY0SvNZT9Lhwjr6Rvhsw2u7TQnu9wqK3l5eSAeq-U1VlCVV-hUUrh_ynrAc9kvROALFJ-0wA4eOLRlRXTz4pSbz41zQSkG9e3ixutEh2_fOsNO2dID3EJCOGS-s2ZjQtU1eoFtBx00/s1600/77bra004.jpg" height="320" width="240"></a>Don’t find the man of your dreams.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Find one that will support your dreams.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> -<i>Excerpt from a </i></span><i>conversation with my
daughter August 2014</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I read Huffington Post.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Yes, it doesn’t carry the literacy of The New Yorker nor the analysis of
The New York Times but it gets the news job done.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It's <span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">usually a quick read in the morning
before my requisite two cups of coffee.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And it has juicy news.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>You<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>know.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The type that<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> you</span> either shake your head at, sends chills down your spine or makes you
thank goodness you don’t live in Thailand.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Guilty as charged.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But sometimes it has stories that make you just think.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was struck by an an article that featured Jeff Bridges the
other day. It was not a celebrity tell all (he didn’t impregnate an
alien)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>but he spoke about his wife and
how his career would be nothing if it weren't for her. It was
charming, complimentary and downright cool. He has clearly stood on the shoulder of a giant.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br>
And he is certainly “THE Dude.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br>
Ah, but Huffington did not disappoint. The next article I read was on Kendall Jenner. Topless. Yet again. In Thailand!<br>
<br>
Get that girl a parent and a bra and perhaps some Ceftriaxone.<br>
<br>
So what two neurons fired to find a connection here? <br>
<br>
Bras. Brassieres, Over the shoulder boulder holders, Goody Hoodies, Nork Sacks, Tit pants, Upper Decker Flopper stoppers, Hooter Holsters, Cup Cake Wrappers and Brass Ears (I have no clue what this one means) . Somewhere deep in my psyche, a 11 year old primordial male neuron fires, sends signals to the motor neurons in my metacarpals, rolls that trackball and can find anything on Sicktionary.<br>
<br>
Ah, yes. The connection. Yes there is one.<br>
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Bras, the really good ones without euphemisms, are very similar to life partners:<br>
<br>
Very few of us look good without one. But there are always exceptions.<br>
<br>
We need them for more than 18 hours a day. <br>
<br>
They lift you, yet separate when you need breathing room.<br>
<br>
The good ones cross your heart gently, passionately, not stomp all over it.<br>
<br>
We don't need one when we are younger yet the first ones can be trainers too. <br>
<br>
And strong, emotionally athletic ones hold you really close when you are really going over rough terrain.<br>
<br>
Victoria, your secret is out.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Because support can be beautiful. At age 52 I certainly know what Playtex meant
physically. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br>
Now I finally know
emotionally too.<br>
<br>
And Kendall, Rumor, Rihanna, etc.: <i>Over exposure makes you just another boob.</i><br>
<i><br></i>
<i>Equal time: I guess athletic supporters fill that same role for gentlemen. But where are those advertisements?</i></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-51901483612910991692014-06-24T10:55:00.001-04:002014-06-24T10:56:21.009-04:00<div class="MsoNormal">
A Clinician’s Eye<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With a clinician’s eye<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My plumber has <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
a variegated mole on his left check <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
that needs attention<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And the neighbor has lost <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Perhaps a future along with<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
too much weight in the 6 months <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
since I have last seen her<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And the rash on the boy <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
on the cheek <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
in check-<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
out line <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
pairs well <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
with his slight wheezing <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
and shiners<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But I keep my tools cast down <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
to myself<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Minding my own clinical business<o:p></o:p></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-11907801436840876772014-01-19T17:36:00.000-05:002014-01-19T17:36:08.054-05:00Minds and Hands<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4PSTtf14Qg_ykgJOOm0Upg1IJBirzhYnNg_nIJ05eRHLngv7KebfuxyBLg5ir7hYOoYJE5H5quQgrlrfy9wMVf7ylDZibNmNMCiDSiBXteJCg-Ks50Y9QWO1IcFx67G4Szw_CHg7tbzc/s1600/imgres.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4PSTtf14Qg_ykgJOOm0Upg1IJBirzhYnNg_nIJ05eRHLngv7KebfuxyBLg5ir7hYOoYJE5H5quQgrlrfy9wMVf7ylDZibNmNMCiDSiBXteJCg-Ks50Y9QWO1IcFx67G4Szw_CHg7tbzc/s1600/imgres.jpeg" /></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am a child of a child of the Depression. Growing up I learned to be as frugal as possible. Stale bread was always turned into breadcrumbs if it hadn’t already become moldy. Clothes were always dried outside and never in expensive dryers. Home repairs were at least attempted until the job either got too complicated or way too expensive to fix on your own. No one hired painters. If you wanted your room painted, it was done as a group project bright and early on a Saturday morning. Children were for the woodwork and adults the ceilings. The walls were up for grabs. No exceptions.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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Yard work was always hard work. Thank goodness we lived in the city and our yard was not that big. My kindly uncle who lived down the street taught me. He was quite the character: part railroad worker, part classical reader, big time gambler and amazing gardener. His training (for all disciplines) came from the Civilian Conservation Corps, the job program started in the 1930’s for young unemployed men. Hours I would spend with him and his garden as he regaled in his stories that always started with “Jackson, when I was in the CCC camps…” I have no idea where he got that nickname from but he was the only one who called me that. I planted things I would never eat, yet delighted in cultivating. Rhubarb, tomatoes, horseradish, and zucchini were planted in his “victory” garden. I handled real fish heads that legend has it the Native Americans used to condition their crops. (Or at least that’s what he told me.) I learned how to save the seeds for the next harvest and to sun dry tomatoes on the back porch way before they were sold in expensive oil in specialty markets. And who could forget "zombie geraniums?"<o:p></o:p></div>
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I cringe when my children leave a room and do not turn the light out or leave the television on. I hate when someone has turned the thermostat to 72ºF. I love a brisk 62-65º. My children make fun of my sweater collection not realizing it was a necessity growing up. Surprisingly when my daughter came home from college this Christmas, she raided my sweater collection. I delight in relatively recent recycling trends although I feel my family had been doing it for decades. Paper bags became book covers, or if we were really fancy, left over “Sanitas” that graced the many walls of our aged urban Victorian. The old adage "Waste not-want not" certainly was strongly advised.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Who could forget my mother’s “Depression soup?” It was her comfort food on a cold winter’s day. It was simply warm milk, leftover noodles of any shape or variety and salt and pepper. It certainly can fill an empty belly.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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These are lessons that we have gotten away from in the last generation. Simple items. Simple food. Simple chores. You lose a side of yourself when you don’t know how to fix something, make something, grow something or even try. Life doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. Not all manual labor is distasteful or without thought. I have many friends ranging from an amazing internist who sews designer quilts to a highly regarded trial attorney who does cross-stitch. Necessary for warmth or decoration? Probably not. Good for mental health? Ask them. We have not only intellect but also hands. I love the motto of my sister’s alma mater MIT: “Mens et Manus”. Ah, Mr. Kaster what would I do without your sadistic Latin teachings? “Mens et Manus” means “minds and hands”. Life should be the right combination of the two in good times and bad. Wonderful lessons from leaner times that we should think of today.<o:p></o:p></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-61999018767243835582014-01-14T22:13:00.000-05:002014-01-14T23:37:08.627-05:00God Bless You, Mr. Minivan<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvY47qFYnylmZ7K5TQYP4PNTsdHuiO6ebV1gLgP-qWjuevMNxyLbWYb72jswJJSVVpJ_lhXT1herR3u5sUy2mQ19DfaiIKGUKTJzVfO7ypFDHhDpJBuDIg_k8NjokBOL3lvRMVzFIgXrU/s1600/Unknown-9.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvY47qFYnylmZ7K5TQYP4PNTsdHuiO6ebV1gLgP-qWjuevMNxyLbWYb72jswJJSVVpJ_lhXT1herR3u5sUy2mQ19DfaiIKGUKTJzVfO7ypFDHhDpJBuDIg_k8NjokBOL3lvRMVzFIgXrU/s1600/Unknown-9.jpeg" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><i>“You will last a lot longer, if you don't try to sing.” </i></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">― </span><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/2778055.Kurt_Vonnegut" style="background-color: white; color: #666600; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-decoration: none;">Kurt Vonnegut</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">, </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/4076" style="color: #666600; text-decoration: none;">God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater</a></i><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The roads were slick
yesterday with the Northeast snow.
Undeterred I went shopping anyway, songs blasting and heavily clothed in
my minivan retreat.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The ride went smoothly,
predictably and the stores not crowded.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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It was the drive home that
was a source of anxiety then relief.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Route 695 is my Circle of
Willis, providing a major artery to all things Baltimore.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Want to go to IKEA for high
styled yet temporary furniture?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>695 to 43.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Want to go to a horse show in
Finksburg?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>695 to 795.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Want to go to DC?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>695 to 95 to 495 past the looming Mormon
Temple that still gives me the heebie-jeebies.<o:p></o:p></div>
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God Bless you Mr. Minivan.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I have had more expensive
cars in my home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ones with pimp-inspired
rims.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ones with not only heated seats
but air-conditioned ones as well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ones with
back massagers, laser speed control, and rear-view signal turns. I have even
thought in a more fecund phase of getting a Tesla, which provides the practicality
of an electric engine, amazing style and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>(I admit) relief of a good old-fashioned middle-aged crisis.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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<div class="MsoNormal">
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But God bless you Minivan.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I saw the minivan on the
right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Same model as mine but a different color. </span>Overturned but not damaged below
the slope of the mildly elevated highway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I could easily see how the accident occurred.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Someone probably wasn’t paying attention,
lulled by singing along with Steely Dan at the top of his or her lungs or playing with the connected iPhone for a new playlist on iTunes. Or perhaps reading a
short text from home asking me what is for dinner.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not paying the upmost of attention, they
swerved to avoid the car in front, not fully realizing the slick conditions,
veering off onto the shoulder, unguarded by rails.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Easy Peasy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Simple, but costly in emotion, car repairs and future insurance
premiums. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
By the time I had approached,
the vehicle was righted and emergency personnel clearing the shoulder.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
The clinician inside of me
always listens and waits for ambulances in accidents like these.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can subtly tell the extent of injury by
their rush to the scene.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No ambulance
heard, then the crash victims walked away.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Hurried rush, there is usual serious life threatening injury.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>An ambulance in view but no sirens, then the unfortunate
has succumbed to the injuries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There was no ambulance called
for this accident.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The passengers were safe
and sound and standing, albeit distressed, by the side of the road.<o:p></o:p></div>
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No need for ambulances here.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
No need for further
rubbernecking either.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nothing to see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing to see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Move along. Move along.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
God Bless you Mr. Minivan.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I thank God sometimes for my
practicality. Despite my often-perilous driving habits, it’s nice to know I
have a safety net.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But it also has a DVD player that I admit I have never watched and a
moon roof I have never opened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">And that iPhone connector.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Options. Options.<br />
<br /></div>
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-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-29675568465512989002013-12-10T12:08:00.000-05:002013-12-10T12:08:42.816-05:00The Quiet of the Snow<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<i style="font-family: 'American Typewriter';"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">I like the
quiet of the snow.</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">The giant
white muffler on the engines of life<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Falling
gently<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Stealthily<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Making dawn
clean and white<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">I
like the slow crackle of fire<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Then a shock against the flight<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Logs
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<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Embers
glowing<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Making the
room grow with delight<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">I
like the laughter of children<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Clothed
in bundles beyond site<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Playing
gaily<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Unconscientiously<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Squealing as
they put up a fight<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">There’s
music in the silence<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Often
not listened to in the grind of daily life<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Playing
silently<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Slowly<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: "American Typewriter";"><i><span style="color: #3d85c6;">Only to be
heard when the day is white<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-18728301522026118922013-12-05T21:58:00.000-05:002013-12-05T22:12:40.365-05:00Ms. Bloggy Pants<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIz211UGCx0L-4VCpS6HTiJ0lkLkN8h_nZZmmwc9R1OcZUDTfM4p_CXZWRVzM3D0cVCzoLqKdSShhNMt7I-vI07PO_aiq1Xpw0R4mwnPdeMUJ5fBaHTx7-wH2CpQ26oYjn3NrTPLzeVRM/s1600/smartie-pants-1978-cd-cover-43832_edited-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIz211UGCx0L-4VCpS6HTiJ0lkLkN8h_nZZmmwc9R1OcZUDTfM4p_CXZWRVzM3D0cVCzoLqKdSShhNMt7I-vI07PO_aiq1Xpw0R4mwnPdeMUJ5fBaHTx7-wH2CpQ26oYjn3NrTPLzeVRM/s320/smartie-pants-1978-cd-cover-43832_edited-1.jpg" width="226" /></a></div>
After more than a year of silence, I have resurrected this
blog. Not for any strokes of great
brilliance and certainly not for any self-aggrandizement. My plan was to quietly wile away with my
opinions, vague literary references and thoughts of the day.<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Life is getting tough again and I need to vent.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And my girls are sick of me arguing my odd ideas at the
dinner table not knowing even a third of my references.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Peter Frampton?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Is he
on Glee?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Wittgenstein?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A
museum in NYC?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Psycho? Are you talking about your family again, Mom?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The references are endless yet their tolerance limited.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So here I go again.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Thanks for outing me, Dr. C.<o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
And the picture might as well be in Hutchinson, Mr. C.</div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-11938127436845388482013-11-28T22:48:00.000-05:002013-11-28T22:48:53.948-05:00Genies…..<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #393939; font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;">The Food and
Drug Administration had been kept waiting long enough. On November 22nd the
FDA, America’s public-health regulator, sent a stern letter to 23andMe, a
genetic-testing firm. Despite “more than 14 face-to-face and teleconference
meetings, hundreds of e-mail exchanges and dozens of written communications”,
the FDA complained, the company had not met its requests for data—nor even
contacted it since May. The FDA ordered 23andMe to stop selling its testing
service forthwith. The company has 15 days to respond to the regulator’s
concerns. Fights over genetic testing, however, are sure to go on for a lot
longer. ------The Economist November 30, 2013</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4aPeI3VmiTsTvN6GmA2s-dyc3x_aGo0Bnqy06zVlO82tJBpWl43wn81wdB2w6li_y-TrNBeZ1Fw-GB7PaVb7FUAD-MPJ227-TvPt5B8Us-rCF0bLtNCbP07Z8IQ6uPNO_JdhilmDcKeA/s1600/images-2.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4aPeI3VmiTsTvN6GmA2s-dyc3x_aGo0Bnqy06zVlO82tJBpWl43wn81wdB2w6li_y-TrNBeZ1Fw-GB7PaVb7FUAD-MPJ227-TvPt5B8Us-rCF0bLtNCbP07Z8IQ6uPNO_JdhilmDcKeA/s1600/images-2.jpeg" /></a>Wouldn’t we all like to predict the future?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A crystal ball in hand with a gypsy by your
side, you could see yourself older, <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>wiser and generally steering clear of
mistakes, correcting what was wrong and live happily ever after?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>23andme</i> tried to do that.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But even with all the money Google had to offer, it just wasn’t true.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I had a sobering revelation this Thanksgiving morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My sister had found a new website to discover
news from New York City and the surrounding area from the 1920’s and 30’s.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We had always wondered the fate of a Great Grand Uncle who
was described as “Poor Johnny” because of his exposure to mustard gas in WW1.
Family stories had always been incomplete and usually ended with just
head bowing and shaking with the accompanied “Tsk, Tsk.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We thought we made progress when we found he
had been shuttled back and forth between several “National Old Soldiers Homes,” a
progenitor of the current VA hospitals.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The new search revealed a more sobering fate.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Johnny had a severe criminal and mental
history and probably died in an institution for the criminally insane in Beacon
New York.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His sister had the same fate
at Pilgrim State Hospital although a decade later.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nature vs. Nurture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Nurture vs. Nature.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are we fated
to bad outcomes?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Are we fated toward
good outcomes? Does the genes that made Poor Johnny mad live inside me? Am I mad for revealing this in a public blog?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A friend of mine wrote a blog today about his diagnosis of
Leiden V disease AFTER the diagnosis of a blood clot that eventually lodged in
his lung.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He lamented about how the
self-acclaimed best physicians in this world could have ( should have? would
have?) diagnosed this before and put him on preventative blood thinners heading
off <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>weeks of suffering and near death.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Are we to screen everyone for everything? Should we
medically screen everything to head off potentially fatal disasters ?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How much would this cost? Would it be cheaper
than suffering the fate of its consequences?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We can’t predict the future. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>At least not yet. Not sure I want to.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #343434; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt;">דער
מענטש טראַכט און גאָט לאַכט. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #343434; font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt;">Der
mentsh trakht un got lakht. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #343434; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">“Man plans, God laughs”, so says
the Yiddish proverb.</span><span style="mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
On this Thanksgiving day we should heed the sage advice a
friend of mine told me years ago which I think about every morning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He is a friend that knows me more than most.
I <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>was boring him with complaint after
complaint until he finally caught me and said “I just thank God I wake up every
morning.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Simple advice, seldom heeded.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I thank God (whatever the word “God” entails) I woke up this
morning and did my best to make this a wonderful day. I made a wonderful
Thanksgiving dinner for my girls.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> They made pie (yuk!).</span> We ate, dogs by our sides and a roaring
fire in the adjoining living room.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I thank God for this day and wish for many more.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One morning at a time.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Genes, preconceived notions, gossip be damned.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-RQtkl_SqzwgSu0gdBPpZf3OWN88JFpzZbmvefhmTt6zAv46BdRkj3yIg-e7ePlFcoh-Ic8mn9JcCa4cSIBG8YqeG35hWc6CLDvB52ZbQTunhdchwLhrgjRzfac_6UyUJdV2JxpebU1k/s1600/Dad+and+the+Cigarette+Girl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="304" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-RQtkl_SqzwgSu0gdBPpZf3OWN88JFpzZbmvefhmTt6zAv46BdRkj3yIg-e7ePlFcoh-Ic8mn9JcCa4cSIBG8YqeG35hWc6CLDvB52ZbQTunhdchwLhrgjRzfac_6UyUJdV2JxpebU1k/s320/Dad+and+the+Cigarette+Girl.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>Time it was, and what a
time it was, it was <o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>A time of innocence, a
time of confidences <o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>Long ago, it must be, I
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><i>Preserve your memories,
they're all that's left you</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> -Bookends <i>Simon and Garfunkel</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Yesterday, I received a
letter from the parish where my late father’s funeral was held. They celebrate a mass for all who have died
in the past year. As a tribute and as identification, they request a
picture from the family to form a collage.
In fine Roman Catholic Church tradition, the obligatory donation is also requested.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have many pictures of
my father. One even dates back to 1928,
the year of his birth. My grandmother is
standing holding him as an infant with an old Jersey City tenement in the
background. My grandmother is wearing a
short bob and laced up shoes as was stylish in the 1920’s. Her blue eyes beaming brightly as a lighter contrast in the black and white picture.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I have tons of other
photos that chronicle his life. A
communion photo, rooftop photos, a
baseball photo, yearbook photos and his wedding photo. There are progressive ones with just my sister as an
infant, then me, then my brother. More recent ones are with his successive
grandchildren, first with my sister's boys then my girls. One showing him carving pumpkins with my girls some years ago is one of my favorites. The last photo taken
was in the assisted living facility. It is the saddest of all as it documents in full technicolor his sad decline.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">But the one I chose was the most classic one of all. It is from 1953. It is a photo of him with a cigarette girl at the Latin Club in Manhattan at
his bachelor party. I have posted it on
Facebook in the past. It has become one
of my favorites. In it, he is young, randy, impeccably dressed, irreverent, so full of life, invincible against his smoking habit, and beaming
at the very attractive cigarette girl.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #373737; font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 20px;"><br /></span></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #373737; font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 20px;">Nice, Dad.</span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The Church didn’t much
care for my irreverent joke at his mass.
I thought the old priest would have a stroke when I announced not the
perfunctory “Readings from the Gospel of so and so.” Instead I announced a “Reading from the Book of George Carlin,” and waited for the laugh that didn't come. Let's put it this way, good comedians know their audience. I am clearly not a good comedian. Despite my age, I was scolded by my aunt and frowned upon by many cousins. </span><br />
<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">On some more shit lists yet again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">But my father would have
gotten the joke. I would have initially gotten a fist-pounding “Jesus Christ!” out of him but then a hysterical laugh. I can see him smirking as he shook his head, proud that his often irreverent style was not lost on the succeeding generation.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";"> I think he
would get the joke of this picture too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I sent it in this
morning.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #373737; font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 15.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Miss you Dad.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-21201950349727193742012-09-25T21:31:00.000-04:002012-09-27T08:47:05.221-04:00A Hail Mary Pass<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHxtEYhlNsTIWPRwXOQjVC1tGyFvy4tiDOeJ97xJrGlrdecnK9lWzW8RiVtO84IqKHt2VDilOpKM0HNmsPWcuqrcp8IzsduQ73D3AAHM5BM8gZ73FnPbOaAGiBPJech3q2QRze6X_y52Q/s1600/images-3.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHxtEYhlNsTIWPRwXOQjVC1tGyFvy4tiDOeJ97xJrGlrdecnK9lWzW8RiVtO84IqKHt2VDilOpKM0HNmsPWcuqrcp8IzsduQ73D3AAHM5BM8gZ73FnPbOaAGiBPJech3q2QRze6X_y52Q/s1600/images-3.jpeg" /></a>A colleague and now a close friend visited me the other
day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are planning to write a
book about a subject that is near and dear to both of us. It is a book about the maternity hospital I was born in.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> The building, now not only shuttered but cinder blocked-up, saw over 350,000 babies born between 1931 and 1979. It also holds some of the best Art-Deco architecture the world has seen. Within its walls, ground breaking work on preeclampsia and maternal-child health was performed. First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt opened the nursery in 1931. And it had one of the first African-American and female board- certified Ob/Gyne on staff who later won a Presidential Medal of Freedom from President Johnson. The list goes on.</span><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
The world needs to know all this and more.<br />
<br />
But like anything truly wonderful in that city, it was overshadowed by political greed and corruption defiling its true greatness.<br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We intermixed discussions of the chapters with salacious gossip, self-confessions
and many hopes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a great and
productive night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She handed them to me as she was leaving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In that split second I thought she was
just grabbing my hand to say goodbye, but I was surprised to feel there was
something in her hand. </div>
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<br /></div>
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“I know you don’t believe in
these but I want you to have them.”</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I couldn’t help but feel the lump in my throat as she walked her to her car, her husband waiting patiently in the driveway.</div>
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<br /></div>
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She gave me bright blue rosary
beads.</div>
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<br /></div>
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Rosary Beads. I have many of them stashed in drawers
from my late mother, late grandmother and aunts. There is even one giant one
with wooden beads and a large crucifix that my girls call “hang gliding
Jesus.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Sarcasm is truly a second
language in my household.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am afraid
I have been the one heavily influencing its continuance.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6.0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6.0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
Wikipedia tells me something I should have remembered
from the twelve long years of catechism:</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6.0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 6.0pt; mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">The
sequence of prayers is the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lord%27s_Prayer"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Lord's Prayer</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">, the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hail_Mary"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Hail Mary</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"> ten times, and the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glory_Be_to_the_Father"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Glory Be to
the Father</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">,
sometimes followed by the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatima_Prayer#The_Decade_Prayer"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Fatima Prayer</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">. Each sequence is known as a decade. Five decades are prayed, after
beginning with the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apostle%27s_Creed"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Apostle's
Creed</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">
and five initial prayers. The praying of each decade is accompanied by
meditation on one of the </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Mysteries_of_the_Rosary"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Mysteries of the Rosary</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">, which recall the life of </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus_Christ"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">Jesus Christ</span></i></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">.<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Mechanically
similar strings of beads are used in other cultures; for example, the Greek </span></i><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kombol%C3%B3i"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #043a95; font-family: Helvetica; text-decoration: none;">kombolói</span></i></a></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">, sometimes called worry beads,
appear similar and are sometimes manipulated in a mechanically similar way, as
if counting, but have no religious or cultural significance.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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I am not one to pray. If I had them, I would have worn out worry
beads by now. The rote recitation of the rosary as a kid was enough to give me
many a headache. Many of the Catholic prayers I sat through and recited
(and remember-even in French) were just words that hopefully comforted
someone because they didn’t comfort me. Besides, we were always praying for
someone else anyway: the starving orphans of Africa, the astronauts of Apollo
13, flood victims, Mrs. Gizzi's many tragic operations, "Money for the
Missions" (to the tune of "Pennies from Heaven"), Sr. Helen
Charles' nervous condition and every other pathetic classroom, horrific
national or dreadful international news item. They might as
well have been in Latin. In fact, I think I would have
preferred the Latin since I would have learned something.<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But lately I have been seeing rosaries more. It is a
tradition in my family to have a rosary made of red roses hung in the caskets of
deceased family members.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I saw one several weeks ago as I attended my father’s cousins’ wake. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It flooded me with memories of the far too many others I have seen in my lifetime.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
But these blue ones are
different. My friend has Stage 4 Breast Cancer and is doing well. In fact, I am in awe of her indomitable spirit and zest for life. Perhaps she meant them as a talisman holding some mystical powers because I can’t seem to take them out of my pocket. Maybe that is the real "mystery of the rosary:" a human connection for hope amid a lot of despair. I find it a bit jarring
that the rosary contains fives “decades” or sets of prayers. Perhaps you have
to be fifty to find meaning in these damn things? Or perhaps experience enough to actually need them?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have been granted the opportunity for a Hail Mary Pass in November. Details are not necessary.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Maybe with the right amount of study, a few beads, and lots of discipline, I will score.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Go team J! </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
If Madonna can wear a cheer leading costume, maybe I can too. God, Jesus, Our Lady of Fatima and the historic Apostles know, I was never the type. It has to be blue to match those beads.<br />
<br />
Well, on second thought, maybe just blue pompoms. Like Mother Madonna, I am five decades old, after all.</div>
<!--EndFragment-->-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-3721556486826195122012-09-15T17:57:00.003-04:002012-09-15T20:30:53.079-04:00Quidditch, Zoroastrianism, and the Languages of Papua-New Guinea<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcgwbrcSjNGDTj0x16KOMxfv5gZ2K28mDQpbz-KsrHWN77C8vftvHphXrG1AQNmhyphenhyphentKhw0yAsYlDKZUTjTUoQmfM78ZHG7parM0SXTd8VAldmORCjClstW28HOv8keztcrLFY9BP-9SIQ/s1600/images-8.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcgwbrcSjNGDTj0x16KOMxfv5gZ2K28mDQpbz-KsrHWN77C8vftvHphXrG1AQNmhyphenhyphentKhw0yAsYlDKZUTjTUoQmfM78ZHG7parM0SXTd8VAldmORCjClstW28HOv8keztcrLFY9BP-9SIQ/s1600/images-8.jpeg" /></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I am so grateful for the Internet and all its trappings. I am
no longer an idiot to my children when subjects that I should have read about and remembered somewhere in my fifty years resurface in a high school assignment, a grade
school composition or a college application. I nod in agreement on whatever the subject, then sneak off
to use Safari on my iPhone. Don’t tell them.
It will dispel the myth that Mom is some kind of genius. I’m just really curious, warding off a head slapping V-8 moment, and really embarrassed
to look stupid. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">It’s not my first stealthy acquisition of recovered knowledge.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Medical school and residencies were also
fraught with similar schemes of one-upmanship.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Only then, our peripheral brains were carried in over sized
pockets with indexes of medical tidbits, charts, equations and definitions. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Assignment c</span>lipboards had the “Wash U” manual
attached as a cookbook for saving both your patient’s lives and your dumb ass. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you mini-Harrison’s textbook, too.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Its enough to have Attention Deficit Disorder.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I listen to music on the radio sometimes and think “Am I
singing those lyrics right?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Okay,
a quick look at www.azlyrics.com at a long stoplight <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>and “Mad drool all the way”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>becomes the correct “Mad bull has lost his way,” from <i>Gimme
Shelter</i>. And apparently that is a reference to the cruel behavior of a Texas
Sheriff during the civil rights movement. Thank you Wikipedia and 3G.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I am not the only one.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How many times do you now have to beep your horn at someone who didn’t
notice that the lights had changed? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I read the news today, oh boy….Thank you, New York Times
on-line.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">The sudden
storm we recently experienced in the Baltimore-Washington area with gale force
winds, a deluge of rain but without a hurricane warning became a “derecho,” a
word I had never heard of before and still mispronounce.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank you, Merriam Webster on-line.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Derecho is pronounced: day- ray-cho. Thank you www.forvo.com/word/gazetteer/ </span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Different accents are also available. The British always sound better and more intelligent than Americans, except for that "schedule" thing.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">And for those who are just curious:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Quidditch is the game played in Harry Potter but also now in over 300 universities and high schools. Thanks, www.internationalquidditch.org.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Zoroastrianism was formerly a major religion in the world and now only practiced by approximately 190,000 followers. Thank you, www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/zoroastrian/ataglance/.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">And there are over 350 languages and dialects spoken in Papua -New Guinea. Again, what would we all do without Wikipedia.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #222222; line-height: 16px;">Googlito ergo sum.</span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #222222; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #222222; line-height: 16px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Perverse Latin for “I google therefore I am.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I am not the only one. Imagine that, John Lennon (and azlyrics.com). </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">And yes I googled “Google” to get the image above. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment-->-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-25780860701272933662012-09-09T20:21:00.000-04:002012-09-10T13:03:14.493-04:00Bruce, Borges and the Fountain of Youth<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYbSU4s6sNcqzWi1fQkWvkFKuiKWsYNpVxTJbHD59z3ZiqiBV6INAw4vHZiA5gxT2BM2csH2vRxDTvrwdXD4-8TGVqDaNVFm8cPh_k6uMzAtuQdPyhLPPTqlXgKhwtABnxSUdgfAomI9k/s1600/images-1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYbSU4s6sNcqzWi1fQkWvkFKuiKWsYNpVxTJbHD59z3ZiqiBV6INAw4vHZiA5gxT2BM2csH2vRxDTvrwdXD4-8TGVqDaNVFm8cPh_k6uMzAtuQdPyhLPPTqlXgKhwtABnxSUdgfAomI9k/s320/images-1.jpeg" width="243" /></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-size: 14.0pt;">If
youth is the period of hero-worship, so also is it true that hero-worship, more
than anything else, perhaps, gives one the sense of youth. To admire, to expand
one’s self, to forget the rut, to have a sense of newness and life and hope, is
to feel young at any time of life.</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></span></i>
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; mso-bidi-font-family: Helvetica; mso-bidi-font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></i><i><span style="color: #262626;">–Sociologist Charles Horton Cooley </span></i><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 14pt;">
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
I thought of the late Jorge Luis Borges, the writer, the other day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Something popped up on Facebook that it
was his 113<sup>th</sup> birthday and it amazed me that I had once been in the company
of someone (besides my grandmother) who could be that old now.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I clearly have trouble accepting this middle-age thing.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I didn’t really meet him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had read sections of his masterful <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ficciones</i> in college and thought it would be cool to see him at a
lecture at my university. I was never really into hero worship
but somehow I needed to go to that lecture.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As usual, I went by myself, lest I be terrified to
go with another student who might ask me questions that may have indicated I hadn’t
read Borges’ text all that well.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Learning by terror was one way I made it through college. I don’t
think I was the only one.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I still have
the visual in my head. I was sitting in Cobb Hall only about 30 feet from him
on the left side of the auditorium.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Borges</span> was a very old man, seated at a table on stage, barely audible, his
papery skin holding a cane with both hands. He whispered his answers to
questions that I don’t even remember. I don’t think it even mattered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was the kind of interview that only
really elderly people get.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Soft
and respectful questions then mumbled answers. He spoke in Spanish, another
barrier to my understanding. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I do remember being in awe of someone who actually
wrote the magically complex stories that we had studied.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don’t go to many lectures or concerts anymore. There are the ones with my
preteen daughter, but frugality tells me I can download most good music on my
iPhone or iPod.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Medical stuff aside, NPR now serves as my auditory education in the arts, politics, economics, sociology and the humanities. My minivan is my lecture hall. </span>Concerts are often
a hassle, expensive, and bizarre going to alone. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Bruce Springsteen was another must-see during college. I
remember going to a record of three Springsteen concerts in one week in 1981.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My former roommate was enthralled (obsessed?) with him and
although I was just a fan, her fervor was contagious.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have to say that Mr. Springsteen put on quite a show. I
would love to see if now, thirty years later, he still has that enthusiasm. A recent
Rolling Stone article about his nearly 4 hour marathon concert in Europe reported<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>that Mr. Springsteen has not slowed
down. Perhaps his fountain of youth is contagious too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What do we really get out of being in the same room, concert hall or stadium with a famous person or act when their work can be
experienced by other venues?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I confess I love biographies. I like to read that the famous and the infamous led real lives. Perhaps at the concert and lecture halls, we get the idea that these people, even with their amazing
gifts, are human too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They live,
they breathe, they age, they sweat, they smell like Bengay, they take bathroom
breaks, they make mistakes. Just like us.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
But I think Mr. Cooley also has
a point.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We get a tiny bit of time back when we connect to those we admire. And not just the pun of the 1975 magazine cover.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Rereading <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Ficciones</i>
again will be easy. I still have the book.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> I am such a pack rat. </span><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Mr. Borges, I learned. Although it seemed it was the very hard way as usual.</span><br />
<br />
Now about seeing Springsteen. He's appearing at the Meadowlands later this month.<br />
<br />
Now that would certainly shed the years and make me forget the rut on many levels.<br />
<br />
Logistics be damned.<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment-->-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-16537096407224197842012-08-23T22:53:00.000-04:002012-08-23T22:53:46.101-04:00The Usual Suspect<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_JAysElRZPyuqHjvlAotl1M5FwpTPDyG7NxvCQX_HjBvEgUjvXyrweHfsGQNJ_x4E4Tk2_UkohXMmPbjCejDcMgNyEATrgL0hONvJXHr6V0w9hdxtcK4-NxcJmG1WEUTBsCSz6Vlj7D8/s1600/images-13.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_JAysElRZPyuqHjvlAotl1M5FwpTPDyG7NxvCQX_HjBvEgUjvXyrweHfsGQNJ_x4E4Tk2_UkohXMmPbjCejDcMgNyEATrgL0hONvJXHr6V0w9hdxtcK4-NxcJmG1WEUTBsCSz6Vlj7D8/s1600/images-13.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana Bold';">Verbal </span></b><i><span style="font-family: Verdana;">[telling Detective Kujan the
story of Keyser Soze]</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">:</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> He
lets the last Hungarian go. He waits until his wife and kids are in the ground
and then he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids, he kills their
wives, he kills their parents and their parents' friends. He burns down the
houses they live in and the stores they work in, he kills people that owe them
money. And like that he was gone. Underground. Nobody has ever seen him since.
He becomes a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night.
"Rat on your pop, and Keyser Soze will get you." And no one ever
really believes. <o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana Bold';">Dave Kujan</span></b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">:</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> Do you believe in him, Verbal?<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><b><span style="font-family: 'Verdana Bold';">Verbal</span></b><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;">:</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"> Keaton always said, "I don't believe in God, but I'm afraid of
him." Well I believe<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;">in God,
and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"><a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000228/"><span style="color: windowtext; font-family: 'Verdana Bold';"><b>Verbal</b></span></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana Bold';">:</span></i><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; font-family: Verdana;"> Who is Keyser Soze? He is
supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody believed he was
real. Nobody ever saw him or knew anybody that ever worked directly for him,
but to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never
knew. That was his power. The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was
convincing the world he didn't exist. And like that, poof. He's gone. <o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #262626; font-family: Verdana;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: x-small;"> -The Usual
Suspects 1995</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
I tell my children stories.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I try not to embellish but sometimes it is to make a point
and give them a warning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also try
to make myself or the situation as badass as possible. Having a background in
medicine makes for some cool stories sometimes. But not this time.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
Are they fables? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No animals involved here. Parables?
Maybe. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
All are true. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 374.0pt;">
<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think there is a little of Keyser Soze in all of us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><br />
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span>
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">Maybe just on the road.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I was in the airport picking up my eldest the other
day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had finished her work in
Ohio and was coming home by herself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She's a mature 16 year old and I didn’t worry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope I have set some kind of precedent in conducting
themselves in any situation.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My middle daughter asked if I had ever lived in Ohio.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was in a talkative mood so I said “No,
not really.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But there was almost
the time I had to spend the night in jail there.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought my
daughter would fall off the airport bench.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Her eyes widened then narrowed in expressions of surprise then
suspicion.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, Mom, you’re kidding right?”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
“No, I am not.” <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My lesson in child-rearing:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>always keep them guessing. And my children have wild
imaginations, thank goodness.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I proceeded to tell the story of having my Dad’s 1978 Buick
Regal for the summer in Chicago and needing to drive it home for the fall.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My sister was up in Evanston and we
shared the car, finally realizing it was more trouble than it was
worth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was living in a campus fraternity
for its cheap housing and became friendly with my fellow students.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A fellow student RK was also living
there and he was also from NJ.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He
had wanted to drive home to surprise his parents so we made the deal that he
would share both the driving and the gas money.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Driving from Chicago to NJ is not a big deal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You allow yourself an entire day,
plenty of gas, money, pack some food that can fit into a cooler, hopefully some
compatible music on the radio and some good conversation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If Harry and Sally could do it, RK and
I certainly could.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The trip started out fine.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Going on I80 in Indiana was quick, painless and RK fell
asleep.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No problem. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>He was a bit of a pain the ass anyway
only I didn’t quite know the extent yet. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I found out this easy way that college men could sleep
through anything and despite having the radio at a sizeable decibel, RK still
slept.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God only knew what he did
the night before. I really didn’t want to know. Someone that sleepy perhaps
shouldn’t be behind the wheel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Maybe that was his ploy.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have a lead foot.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am a very good driver and can handle speeds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By the time Ohio came, I was anticipating the monotonous
mind-numbing ride through Pennsylvania so I was speeding no doubt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
Well, unfortunately, it caught
the eye of an Ohio State trooper.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p> </o:p>I was stopped. Little did I know it was not just a quick
review of my license, a tongue lashing, then a scribbled ticket by the always tightly-wound, perfectly-groomed State Trooper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
No, it was a command to follow
him to the nearest police station.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He said I was going 82.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was really going about 92.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I went with his version of the story.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
RK slept all though the entire exchange. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We got to the station. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was not the only one stopped that September day. Me, a
truck driver and a father and son team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>What a group.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I figured it was as good a time as any
to wake RK up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Talking loudly did
not work.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Screaming didn’t
either.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I finally had to shake
him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Incoherently he finally awoke
and you can imagine his surprise when I said “Hey, R you need to wake up.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are at a police station.”</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
I would have preferred a Harry
in the car.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For what seemed an eternity, we all sat on the bench waiting
our respective speeding sentences, Me, RK, the trucker and the father/son team.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The trucker went first, grumbled at the
window and was through in about 20 minutes.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The father was next and eyed RK as he was whispering very
loudly “Do you know who he is? He’s Senator AD from Illinois.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never followed politics that closely
in college so RK could have been telling me it was Mr. Green Jeans from Captain
Kangaroo for all I knew.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But as a
tribute to his party, the father/senator listened to the spiel, paid his money
and left without incidence.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My turn was next.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The verdict was to pay the $120 dollar fine or stay in jail to appear in
court the next business day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
was Saturday. I didn’t have all the money. I had about $50 left after paying
for gas. Yikes, two days.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My
parents would have a conniption.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How would I ever get into medical school with an arrest record?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I turned to RK who I knew was holding out. It turns out he had
about $100 and seemed overly annoyed to part with it too.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had already recently just stopped
for gas (that I paid for) so we were good until NJ.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“R, I need your money.” RK started to argue but when I told
him (perhaps not true) we would both have to stay in jail, he relented.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A day in the car with RK was enough but two days together?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was ready to sell some jewelry if not
more.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
We paid.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We got back in the car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>No bid deal. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>RK fell asleep again and I drove the majority of the way. He
made a pain in the ass of himself yet again in NJ by not knowing the right way to
his house leading us back into some nasty streets of Philadelphia at 2am.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So ended my story.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I should have added some more badass elements but my daughter got the
overall message.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
The problem is that I am not
sure what the message even was.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Perhaps not to ever ride with RK.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don’t speed. Don’t trust adolescent men. Never rely on men
for money. You can do even the most stupid of things and still wind up in jail. Politicians are people too. Your mother is not a saint nor a sinner. Perhaps there is the devil in all of us.
Or maybe the trick was convincing a child the devil never existed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And like that, poof. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She’s gone. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Drove away, I heard.<br />
<br />
In a minivan, no less. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Speeding as usual.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-51427902699187671202012-08-12T08:22:00.002-04:002012-08-12T12:53:24.446-04:00A Butterfly<style>
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<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Times New Roman Bold";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">panose</span>-1:2 2 8 3 7 5 5 2 3 4;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">charset</span>:0;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-generic-font-family:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-pitch:variable;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Times New Roman Bold Italic";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">panose</span>-1:2 2 7 3 6 5 5 9 3 4;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">charset</span>:0;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-generic-font-family:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-pitch:variable;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoNormal</span>, <span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">li</span>.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoNormal</span>, div.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoNormal</span>
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-style-parent:"";
margin:0in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;}
p.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraph</span>, <span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">li</span>.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraph</span>, div.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraph</span>
{margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-add-space:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;}
p.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst</span>, <span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">li</span>.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst</span>, div.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst</span>
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-add-space:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;}
p.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle</span>, <span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">li</span>.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle</span>, div.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle</span>
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-add-space:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;}
p.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpLast</span>, <span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">li</span>.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpLast</span>, div.<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">MsoListParagraphCxSpLast</span>
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-style-type:export-only;
margin-top:0in;
margin-right:0in;
margin-bottom:0in;
margin-left:.5in;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-add-space:auto;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ascii</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">hansi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;}
@page Section1
{size:8.5in 11.0in;
margin:1.0in 1.25in 1.0in 1.25in;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-header-margin:.5in;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-footer-margin:.5in;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-paper-source:0;}
div.Section1
{page:Section1;}
/* List Definitions */
@list l0
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-list-id:1619606799;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-list-type:hybrid;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-list-template-ids:1109402646 -672477790 67698691 67698693 67698689 67698691 67698693 67698689 67698691 67698693;}
@list l0:level1
{<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-level-start-at:0;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-level-number-format:bullet;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-level-text:-;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-level-tab-stop:none;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-level-number-position:left;
text-indent:-.25in;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ansi</span>-font-size:13.0pt;
font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Arial</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-font-family:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">Cambria</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">fareast</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">latin</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-font-family:"Times New Roman";
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>-theme-font:minor-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">bidi</span>;
color:<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">windowtext</span>;
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">mso</span>-<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ansi</span>-font-weight:normal;}
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ol</span>
{margin-bottom:0in;}
<span style="background: none repeat scroll 0% 0% yellow;" class="goog-spellcheck-word">ul</span>
{margin-bottom:0in;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHkA-Ah9ploZ6alTmGpaDlsUe8PclWdph2oq50UPQhZq5u0qniM_Cd7c4wI8s-NdynYm-8iT60CkfEtw__9PJL56RGaZBMlGLIXaov1LpYJ4Jxm13PKecYR3J1IXrQRMEoWQhP80YWpOk/s1600/images-24.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHkA-Ah9ploZ6alTmGpaDlsUe8PclWdph2oq50UPQhZq5u0qniM_Cd7c4wI8s-NdynYm-8iT60CkfEtw__9PJL56RGaZBMlGLIXaov1LpYJ4Jxm13PKecYR3J1IXrQRMEoWQhP80YWpOk/s1600/images-24.jpg" /></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 13.0pt;">Imagine yourself a
caterpillar.<br />
There's an awful shrug and, suddenly,<br />
You're beautiful for as long as you live.</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 13.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold; mso-fareast-font-family: Arial;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">-<span style="font: 7.0pt "Times New Roman";">
</span></span></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman Bold Italic"; mso-bidi-font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">from </span></i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman Bold"; mso-bidi-font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;">Poem For
People That Are Understandably Too Busy To Read Poetry</span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman Bold Italic"; mso-bidi-font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-weight: bold;"> by
Stephen Dunn</span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10pt;">I noticed
the butterflies first as I got out of the car.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is August.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It
is that time of year. Two butterflies, a swallowtail then a monarch, both on
this roadside bush. Then mooing with the smell of cows and gasoline.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In times like this your senses are
heightened and everything is perceived.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">I stopped to
help at a roadside accident yesterday.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10pt;">My youngest
and I were headed to a concert up north.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It's her favorite boy band.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We hadn’t really planned the day out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She had woken up late and found me outside gardening.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just me and my best helpers, the dogs.
I like to work solo anyway. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have
neglected the garden for about a month and it showed. Weeds are always easier
to pull when they are a foot high.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My daughter was tearful that we hadn’t gotten tickets although she said I had
promised her months ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Thank
goodness there were still some left.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Just the cheap seats and just
the way I like it. </span><span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">One must always keep promises to children.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">We left in
plenty of time although that didn’t stop me from my usual speeding on this
particular road.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It’s somewhat
rural as you get farther from the city into Pennsylvania.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The state police seem to ignore this
stretch of highway and everyone knows it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">I travelled
as usual.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My iPod plugged in and
singing my awful collection of 70s, 80’s and 90’s music. My daughter belted
into her iPod and seatbelt too. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">He came up
on my right.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not enough time for
me to spot him on the right rear view mirror given the loud Suzuki warning.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since I was going 75MPH he must have
been going at least 100-110.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
can’t calculate relative velocity that quickly in my head but it was fast. Very
fast. I don’t usually take notice but the white gas tank was in contrast to his
bright red jacket.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">I didn’t
think about it for the next 5 seconds of travel time until I saw that motorcycle
in two pieces by the right guardrail.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">I know
CPR.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also know ACLS.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I never bothered to learn ATLS since I
don’t work in ERs and it’s only if you have equipment of that sort anyway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10pt;"> I stopped.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Me and a guy hauling a trailer full of cattle.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">At first it
was hard to see him in the brush but his mangled body was there.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His head was at a funny angle to the
body and his right arm turned unnaturally also. His helmet was still in place as if that
really mattered now.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">Silence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Except for the butterflies, the cows
mooing and the whirl of the traffic flow still going 75 MPH.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10pt;">We tried
until the armada of emergency people came. Just me and the cattle guy.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">Despite
efforts, nature reclaimed it’s own. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 10.0pt;">And this
one was just a butterfly of 19.</span></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-55229916304871685082012-07-15T21:49:00.000-04:002012-07-15T23:14:03.483-04:00Blah, Blah, Blahgs, Bloghs, Blogs.....<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5G0Mq86polRGfWYNs7KMFPRAJKB_jjM8m54lS9v9T7RrVxDiX5GxR0PsPhZPjElqQ40EQz03AjQIzynRs3RnL8Ej6Cq4GQqrWNd0GPZuqo9tesqIpzYtTHx39smvutgq0eAhSK1O_yzM/s1600/Doll3-1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5G0Mq86polRGfWYNs7KMFPRAJKB_jjM8m54lS9v9T7RrVxDiX5GxR0PsPhZPjElqQ40EQz03AjQIzynRs3RnL8Ej6Cq4GQqrWNd0GPZuqo9tesqIpzYtTHx39smvutgq0eAhSK1O_yzM/s320/Doll3-1.png" width="256" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo courtesy of Allison B.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I write this crap. No
one else I think would own up to it. It
was inspired by my current hellish life, my reading of other’s blogs and the
thought that I could do no worse than anyone
else. It also serves as an on-going creative
journal for my children too. I wish my own
mother had done the same. Don’t worry, the real juicy stuff never gets published nor
thrown up on Facebook.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I read a lot of blogs.
Some have the best writing I have read in years. On the other hand, some are the worst forms of narcissism I
have ever encountered. I saw one the
other day ( don’t ask me why I searched it out) which included the author demonstrating her
singing abilities-or lack thereof- with a video. Thank goodness for keyboard volume control. I
was tempted to post a video of my own eye-rolling as a comment but my own camera-shyness
and lack of technical know-how prevented me.
Thank God for small favors.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are, of course, the Mommy blogs. Stepford Connecticut is not fictional after all. What planet do these women live on? I actually
signed up for one to just exercise my sarcasm until I got banned from the site even though I had a
faithful following. What could be funnier than commenting on toilet
training? Teenager's messy rooms? Homework excuses? How about my original recipe
for pumpkin cookies for .....dogs? They
(the mommies, that is) ate it up. My dogs actually run from the site of pumpkin pulp. After all, good moms don’t waste the
pumpkin guts when the entire family gathers to carve pumpkins, sing “Kumbaya”
and scare each other with those oh-so-scary but painfully true neighborhood murder-for-hire and self-immolation stories (actually true in my neighborhood). Welcome to Suburbia. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Boo. And don't forget, ladies, to make jack-o-lanterns with those "o's"!</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The Mommy blogs also include those militant home-schoolers.
Some with touches of militant Christianity. Combine the two and you get discussions on: Moses
parting the Red Sea into Fractions, Genesis Genetics, Invertebrate Bible Biology, Intelligent Design for Dummies, Baby Jesus Pediatrics, St. Paul’s Letters to the Epidemiologists, and the ever so popular, St. Peter’s Guide to
American History. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I think I am giving the State of Texas textbook ideas.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I would be insane if I spent every waking hour with my
children. In case you are wondering (because there may be doubts) I don't home-school.<br />
<br />
Craft blogs. Crap blogs. Same difference. Who the hell has
time or interest to make that hideous stuff? Does the world really need a toilet paper holder with a doll’s body?
It reminds me of those hideous color-coordinated bridesmaid dolls which were made as table centerpieces for the Polish weddings of my youth. Who was lucky enough to win the raffle to take purple and
chartreuse Godzilla home?<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There are the political blogs. I especially like Driftglass although I don’t
dislike fellow University of Chicago classmate David Brooks that much. I actually enjoyed Mr. Brooks' ( I can’t call
him David since we never really had classes together) series of reader
contributions on reflections on mid-life.
Granted he didn’t write them, but I thought the idea was superb. I
learned a lot too. Yes, Driftglass, Mr. Brooks is a centrist. So is Andrew Sullivan. Centrism keeps the New York Times still in business to which I am
eternally grateful. Driftglass’s science fiction themed blog on
returning home to Iowa was as good as anything in The New
Yorker recently. Driftglass has earned more respect than just the lint in Ray
Bradbury’s pockets.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Roger Ebert, the movie critic of the Chicago Tribune, posts another well-written blog. As a nod to the old-fashioned journal writing, it is simply titled "Roger Ebert's Journal." Sure, it is dominated by his love of movies but, he also explores more current topics in very well-structured essays. I have learned so much from his work.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The business blogs are a realm unto their own and I don't ever pay attention. I am business savvy but not to the point where it really influences my financial
portfolio to any great extent. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When blogs meld into the newspaper realm as The Huffington
Post has done, it’s a new era in writing and media. I read the Huffington Post but when it "publishes" things by napropaths and chiropractors in the health section, I have serious
issues with its credibility. The Weird News section is always entertaining though.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So whoever (or whomever-I am desperate need of an
editor) reads this blog among many others: First, I haven’t gone crazy. In many ways this writing allows me to keep what little is left of my sanity.
Secondly, yes I am going through a tough time but, like all true cynics, I am a deep-seated
optimist. And finally, I am glad to give someone a bit of a laugh now and then, however ridiculous it may be.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After all, I have learned the hard way, that it’s really
hard to cry when you make yourself laugh.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<i>For those interested, toilet paper holders are available in your choice of dress colors, hair colors and ethnicity: $10.99 COD. Allow a lifetime for delivery. Toilet paper not included. Free macaroni decorated box if you email by midnight. Sarcasm, free, to the first ten customers. This product is not recommended for anyone under the age of 150. </i></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-1188182295163339092012-07-12T11:50:00.000-04:002012-07-13T08:46:57.519-04:00Reeling in the Years<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPovcebJ4IQAnwIXv3ahJgYPFMvGVBh2b5lV_LKroNNAn2xUTC0HHJnLLcKizZ7eez-25uWzUnWmiUF3Bojqp99Cuu5WLfzbUF0GgAD7kgTtY27MZV4nYQQqE8clqJgLrW2HKlD-aaJhY/s1600/images-18.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPovcebJ4IQAnwIXv3ahJgYPFMvGVBh2b5lV_LKroNNAn2xUTC0HHJnLLcKizZ7eez-25uWzUnWmiUF3Bojqp99Cuu5WLfzbUF0GgAD7kgTtY27MZV4nYQQqE8clqJgLrW2HKlD-aaJhY/s1600/images-18.jpg" /></a></div>
<style>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
<i> The weekend at the college</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Didn’t turn out as you
planned</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The things that passed
for knowledge</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I can’t understand</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
- Reeling in the Years <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Steeley Dan</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
<br />
<br />
The clock has started. The college admission race is on and it
seems we are running with the bulls.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
We are visiting colleges this week. I initially resisted this whole process
of college shopping but I have girls who have perfected the art of whining,
threatening and general needling to get what they want. They have a good teacher. They have witnessed similar sessions
with my own late Dad but on other subjects. It’s surprising what lessons are picked up from previous
generations, both good and bad.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I have endured
endless conversations since last January that usually started with “M is flying
to Stanford over Spring Break” and “M and J” are driving up to Providence this
long weekend,” “Do you know that J has visited 20 colleges so far this year and
we haven’t been to one… “ </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
She wore me down.
I relented. But not to waste
an opportunity, I insisted my middle daughter come along. She needs the inspiration just like I
did when at age 14 I was sent to Boston to spend a weekend with my sister.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was my first plane ride. I was surprised it was even suggested by my provincial
parents but I had few opportunities to escape so I went for it. The Newark to Boston flight was short
on Eastern Airlines, but it didn’t matter. It was thrilling anyway. This was before the days of minimal
age for flying alone, extensive airport screenings and the nickel and diming of
passengers on everything from bags packed to $5.00 peanuts.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was a great weekend. Conservative Catholic girl meets the
Big Bang Theory. Crazy dorm antics
stood out the most which included a dorm hallway that was painted entirely
black with overhead red lights, creative living arrangements of student
couples, all night “philosophy” sessions and later than average mornings and the
lounge blackboards filled with hieroglyphic equations. Some would say these things
don’t necessarily pass for knowledge on the MIT campus, but that depends on the
eye of the beholder.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was just the inspiration needed to do well in high school
and try to see the world beyond my city limits. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
Speeding ahead to 2012 on the
same Boston streets but a mere 36 years later: </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My calves hurt from the near constant climbing of stairs on
both Campus N and Campus B. My recent
exercise regimen had come to a grinding halt when the temps soared to over
100ºF anyway. It was usually without
such inclines and I felt it. We picked the right colleges to have a wide
variety of experiences. From
College U where academics was knitted into the fabric of a rich urban campus to
College E whose approach bordered on a trade school then onto to College B
whose student panel answers shone through my blunt devil’s advocate questions. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I also took my girls to MIT too. We have already visited a college that morning and had the
afternoon to waste. Besides they
wanted to see Harvard and I wanted to go back to MIT. I have had minimal use for Harvard since I got a thin
envelope back in 1979. The MIT
campus, like all things 36 years later was barely recognizable: saplings were
now magnificent trees and many new buildings distorted the old familiar map in
my head. I found my sister’s old dorm, East Campus. Same buildings and same lack of security since the entry doors
were wide open. Some things never
change. Despite the protests of my law abiding children, (I think I have done a
good job) I entered the dorm. I knew
my sister would appreciate some pictures.
The black halls were still there but red lights were replaced by an ugly
dropped ceiling. The lounge blackboard,
which once had the scribbles of some undecipherable math problem, was replaced
by a large screen TV. The smell
was the same. Illegal adjoining
rooms were now nailed shut. The creative door paintings were the same. The oak banisters in the dimly lit
industrial stairwells five flights up felt the same too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My iPhone came in handy for many pictures that were
immediately texted to my sister. I
needed my older companion down this road of memory lane.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There was a noticeable attitude shift in my girls after that
visit. I could feel the swirling fog
of college promotional crap lift.
This trip, like mine so many years ago, personalized and grounded the
whole college experience. The
stories I told them about dormitories suddenly became real. It was no longer dry academics. Maybe Mom does know what she’s talking
about after all? Although clearly sometimes not.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
I should book a trip to Chicago
too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Anytime spent with a focused activity with your child is
certainly not time wasted. Let it be camping, canoeing, horseback riding, discussing
theology driving through relentless urban traffic with infinitely fallible GPS or
climbing endless steps of a college that sits on a hill. My eldest experienced the different
academic gestalts. My middle
daughter I think got the inspiration she needed. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
Both weekends at the colleges
didn’t turn out as planned. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
They were better. Far better. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Knowledge doesn’t necessarily come from books, online sites
or dry lectures. Sometimes it has to be seen, smelled, touched, heard and
tasted to be fully understood. Sometimes felt in aching calves, too.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-outline-level: 1;">
I learn so much from the girls. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That includes you too, Sis.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-72402163172058904412012-07-07T00:55:00.000-04:002012-07-07T19:13:18.411-04:00Well Grounded<style>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ7_nNiAMtBgkjIIwvSV2NbPH5RFKaUouaBeiwA6tEBzkwdNBohfDa1iCSpKqLEfVgh6QQ6VRip1nip6nS5aZW9-1EnKNNAMJdKC8A3OUkqbx9NV4R5XMyvd9hqp3Jz4kp1_tTYJDix2Y/s1600/images-17.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJ7_nNiAMtBgkjIIwvSV2NbPH5RFKaUouaBeiwA6tEBzkwdNBohfDa1iCSpKqLEfVgh6QQ6VRip1nip6nS5aZW9-1EnKNNAMJdKC8A3OUkqbx9NV4R5XMyvd9hqp3Jz4kp1_tTYJDix2Y/s1600/images-17.jpg" /></a><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">How
much does your life weigh? Imagine for a second that you're carrying a
backpack. I want you to pack it with all the stuff that you have in your
life... you start with the little things. The shelves, the drawers, the
knickknacks, then you start adding larger stuff. Clothes, tabletop appliances,
lamps, your TV... the backpack should be getting pretty heavy now. You go
bigger. Your couch, your car, your home... I want you to stuff it all into that
backpack. Now I want you to fill it with people. Start with casual
acquaintances, friends of friends, folks around the office... and then you move
into the people you trust with your most intimate secrets. Your brothers, your
sisters, your children, your parents and finally your husband, your wife, your
boyfriend, your girlfriend. You get them into that backpack, feel the weight of
that bag. Make no mistake your relationships are the heaviest components in
your life. All those negotiations and arguments and secrets, the compromises.
The slower we move the faster we die. Make no mistake, moving is living. Some
animals were meant to carry each other to live symbiotically over a lifetime.
Star crossed lovers, monogamous swans. We are not swans. We are sharks. </i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<i> </i> Ryan Bigham<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> “Up in the Air.”</i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">After
tearing up my third wall-to-wall carpet in the past year, and having the callouses,
broken fingernails and lower back pain to prove it, I needed candy. Eye candy that is. And what a better way
to get it than a good George Clooney movie. After downing my Naprosyn</span><span style="color: black;">,</span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span style="color: black;">putting up my feet and having a
dog or two lie down on the couch with me, </span><span style="color: black;"> </span><span style="color: black;">I watched</span><span style="color: black;"> "Up in the Air". </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">It’s a
wonderful film about Ryan Bigham, a traveling “corporate downsizer," a person who is hired to fire people. He lives out of his suitcase, traveling from coast to coast 270 days a year until a young recent college grad devises a way of performing the same horrendous task through videoconferencing. He is "grounded" as a result, discovering, for the first time, love for a similarly well-traveled woman and a connection to his family.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">Yikes, we are
our ho</span><span style="color: black;">uses</span><span style="color: black;">. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">Not
homes in the spiritual sense, but the physical things we live in and with. The four walls</span><span style="color: black;">,</span><span style="color: black;"> or
in Mr. Bigham's case, the lack thereof. </span><span style="color: black;">I look around my own house, now without horrendous pet ravaged wall-to-wall carpeting in
the former basement office that will soon “finally” be a media room. It's a mess with boxes of
things accumulated throughout the years: my collection of wrought iron
Snead bookends, my civil war arsenal (a legacy of my one part gambler one part
history buff uncle), tons of photo albums, books ranging from out-of-date
medical texts to a signed James Joyce novel, my homemade curtains, my
self-refinished cabinet and a few pets just to make life even more unpredictable. They are all me. Things I hold
dear and will most likely outlive me. I laugh at these things sometimes.
Will my daughters keep everything as some legacy to their pack-rat mother?
How about grandchildren? Great grandchildren? Will they laugh, too, at my "Cheezus"
book ( a book that takes a humorous look at Jesus images in ordinary objects)
like I did when my daughter bought it for me?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">I remember a long time ago, interviewing for a medical
practice in the suburbs of Chicago. I was impressed with the woman who
founded the practice. We had similar practice styles and personalities
right down to our mates. We talked for a great deal about what we wanted
out of our jobs and our lives and negotiations went well. For some reason
that escapes me now, she asked me to stop by her house to pick up the final
contract. I was so glad I did. The McMansion was lovely with a
lovely manicured lawn and even a lovely wrought iron fence with a lovely intercom to announce a
lovely visitor. The house was lovely, too, of course, in a vacuous <i>The Way We Were, "</i>Your girl is lovely, Hubbell" kind-of way. The nearly forty
foot entry hall was a barn and I distinctly remember the odd echo as I was
greeted. Her husband never even came downstairs to see who had entered
the home. Something was wrong, I wasn't comfortable, it was too lovely, impersonal, and despite the
great salary and welcoming office staff, I didn't join the practice. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">In two short years she was single again and like so many
physicians now, sold her practice to the local hospital. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">I only partially heeded her unspoken domestic warnings. </span><span style="color: black;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">I am in transition now. My house is a shambles.
My basement resembles a snow fort with so many white boxes piled up you
almost have to tunnel through. If I were five, I would have a ball. But
at fifty, I just envision the bottles of Naprosyn and the heating pad I will inevitably
have to use moving everything to the garage. No need to be doing those bicep curls
for awhile. The garage will be the snow fort soon so the new flooring can
be installed.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">In what has taken me a while others would have done long ago,
but I "finally” gathered up the strength to tear up that carpet, move those
boxes into safekeeping and put down new flooring. New paint, a mix of old and new furniture will be next, then
we will have our media room.
Finally. My media room will
definitely have its own message.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">Afterall, my vintage “fifties” split-level is worth it. The foundation is solid. It is well-grounded. In real estate jargon, it has
good “bones.” It needs a bit of renovation, retooling and certainly
updating but it's still certified. It's not a brand new
house nor one that needs condemning. Its decorations reflect a mix of ethnicities.
It has good and often
quirky qualities: a roof that
retains ice but melts with the slightest of sunshine, the black and
white exterior that may have more than fifty shades of gray within, its sometimes dark corners but often bright
and open rooms for the just the right guests, and its wonderful backyard which has always been open to many new
gardening possibilities.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">Good God, I have literally turned myself into a metaphor.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;">This writing stuff has gone to my....attic? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">I’ll never fully be a swan nor a shark. Unlike Ryan Bigham, I don’t mind the weight of backpacks whether they have mortgages or not. Many have better character loaded down with
“Cheezus” books, a dog or two on the couch, screaming girls in the background, new flooring
and many good, but not necessarily signed novels scattered about.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white;">
<span style="color: black;">Be it ever so humble, there’s no place like my home. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: black;">I think I'll keep her. </span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="color: black;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-51981890398700797272012-06-22T17:39:00.000-04:002012-06-22T17:39:13.359-04:00Nun Sense<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiqB9pHiQLwmrwgBQQ5NzWl4R4ikwClQYwlKlrUNAPNdzGm6zs3VMoZVwhcGCGOGMnioKzYRSE-0lJ9w7R9AZ7aJbh76CIkEDBFhq6fIl5F_wTMzswE5M9ybd9z0C7SG_MnDSa7ncp0aU/s1600/7407669678_f0acd0a92f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiqB9pHiQLwmrwgBQQ5NzWl4R4ikwClQYwlKlrUNAPNdzGm6zs3VMoZVwhcGCGOGMnioKzYRSE-0lJ9w7R9AZ7aJbh76CIkEDBFhq6fIl5F_wTMzswE5M9ybd9z0C7SG_MnDSa7ncp0aU/s320/7407669678_f0acd0a92f.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Times;"> “That’s what I liked about those nuns. You
could tell, for one thing, that they never went anywhere swanky for lunch. It
made me so damn sad when I thought about it, their never going anywhere swanky
for lunch or anything. I knew it wasn’t too important, but it made me sad
anyway…”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Times;">“…They
said they were schoolteachers and that they’d just come from Chicago and that
they were going to start teaching at some convent on 168<sup>th</sup> Street or
186<sup>th</sup> Street or one of those streets way the hell uptown. The one next to me, with the iron glasses,
said she taught English and her friend taught history and American government. Then I started wondering like a bastard what
the one sitting next to me, that taught English, thought about, being a nun and
all, when she read certain books for English.
Books not necessarily with a lot of sexy stuff in them, but books with
lovers and all in them…”<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Times;">“…Oh,
Romeo and Juliet! Lovely! Didn’t you
just love it?” She certainly didn’t sound much like a nun…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: Times;"> -</span></i><span style="font-family: Times;">Holden
Caulfield, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The Catcher in the Rye<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Even Holden got a good sense about nuns. I don’t think it was a
coincidence that he met up with two travelling nuns after his encounter with
Sunny the prostitute. He not only helps them with their cheap suitcase but also
is surprised by their love of Shakespeare's <i>Romeo and Juliet</i>. Their self-sacrifice, their disregard for
expensive things whether it be food or suitcases, and their embrace of the more
human, intellectual and yet romantic side of life did not go unrecognized. They
weren’t “phonies” as Holden was always on the lookout for. Many are the real thing. And I think that we are finally realizing
that today.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
This “Nun sense” has been on my mind lately. I hate to prejudge a book by its cover but I
have to say I am fascinated by Sister Margaret Farley’s recently publicized book
“Just Love.” Anything that the Vatican
condemns is a must-read in my book even if it has taken them 6 years after publication to make that judgment. It
took them nearly 400 years to reverse their denouncement of Galileo’s
theories. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My interest in
Vatican-banned items stems from the Catholic newspaper “The Advocate” from the Newark
Archdiocese that my Aunt subscribed to when I was a kid. I used to read it when at her house for
Sunday dinner. I distinctly remember it had a column devoted to religiously
objectionable media, which, of course, were the first books or movies you really
wanted to see, even as a nine-year –old.<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
No one should have the
right to tell anyone what to read, see or think. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So I will be reading
her book soon. It comes at a time when the midst of rampant pedophilic priest
sexual abuse, the Catholic Church is trying to make itself relevant and
decidedly far right by supporting Republican efforts to narrow abortion rights
and women’s health issues. A surprisingly easy sell in today’s post women’s movement world and I fear for the worst. It is unfortunately not 1974.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
But there is hope. I
am impressed with the “Nuns on the Bus” tour. They, like their evangelical
counterparts, are defying the separation of church and state by protesting the
mostly Republican policies affecting low-income families. They no longer want
the “back of the bus” seats on government matters.
If the women’s movement had it’s peak wave in the 1970’s, the conservative movement is a forceful
undertow pulling our country back. I
applaud these progressive women who want to at least consider a seawall. I will jump on
their bandwagon, er, I mean, bus to
protest recent political issues. I have joined their “Nuns on the Bus” Facebook
page and sent a small donation.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
You go girls. These
were the type of nuns I respected in school. I had a mixed bag of sisters in my
13 (kindergarten + 12) years of Catholic
school. Some were the most patient,
intellectually curious yet practical women I have ever met to this day. Yet
some were just DSM IV’s waiting to be diagnosed. I remember every one of them
(even you Sr. Eucharista) and even have reconnected to some through Alumni or
fundraising events. I still have a
special place in my heart for a certain sister who taught me math throughout my
high school years. Her round jovial face
and small wire framed glasses reminded me of Santa Claus and every class was Christmas.
Her love of teaching all levels of Algebra, Geometry Trigonometry through
Calculus was a true gift. She often started it with a circle on the board and the
joke: “You know people are crazy when
they can draw a perfect circle.” It always followed with a her laugh which made
most of us either wake up or just settle down to concentrate. Her circles were never perfect but her warmth
and inspiration for teaching girls math was. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
These are the women
who did humanity’s (God’s?) dirty work. Whether it be running tough inner city schools
where parents, like mine, wanted a more disciplined academic environment, running
hospitals, ministering to death-row inmates or caring for the world’s untouchables,
they performed in arenas hardly ever visited by gold frocked priests. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I am reminded of the
scene from the movie “Doubt.” Mealtimes
at the convent versus the rectory were portrayed as very different affairs. The Sisters had had orderly meal with grace
and a sharing of ideas. The priests, on
the other hand, had meals that resembled a fraternity party with plenty of alcohol and cigars. It was easy to pick out the more disciplined of the bunch.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I can’t say that I
am a practicing anything now. I don’t
think any particular faith holds all the answers to life’s big questions, but
when impractical guidelines trump common sense, it’s time to question things
very deeply. I think the sisters, at least the good ones, do not avoid these
deep questions.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s funny after all
these years, these ladies are still teaching me things. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Just like Holden. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-6204010763479956232012-06-13T10:50:00.000-04:002012-07-15T09:28:47.000-04:00Ablution<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY-334nASY9UzV1GAUJfrct-MuIZiy9SqaQEUarQ1uIfczNMZ3f3If20NznpsWWX1oS0G3Q59hbx5EBb8YjU-3Bti0R_P-ub6OLRm0PZBjwNfoZXmlErVfoFs5rPAqYYt16UsIOrE_2ZM/s1600/Unknown.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY-334nASY9UzV1GAUJfrct-MuIZiy9SqaQEUarQ1uIfczNMZ3f3If20NznpsWWX1oS0G3Q59hbx5EBb8YjU-3Bti0R_P-ub6OLRm0PZBjwNfoZXmlErVfoFs5rPAqYYt16UsIOrE_2ZM/s1600/Unknown.jpeg" /></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I went to the Trail early this morning for my usual walk,
although given time constraints it’s turning into more of a
walk-jog-walk-walk-jog- walk.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Rain was in the forecast but it didn’t matter. The only preparation I needed was to wear my
older running shoes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Because I needed the ablution.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Every religion has one.
In Christianity it’s a baptism.
Judaism has mikvehs. Islam has
its partial ablution in wudu and whole ablution in ghusls.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I cannot profess any particular faith right now. Forget the Catholic crap I was brought up
on but still remember. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I chose the rain. And it felt wonderful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">You are probably wondering what my sin is. If my original sin is trying to love someone for so many years and that person innately incapable of returning the love I need, then so be it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">Bless me father….<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">The woods are my confessional box and I haven't been on my knees in years.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My penance is my walk-jog-walk-walk-jog then walk.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">My “Hail Marys” are listening to the blue jays squawking in
the background. My “Our Fathers”- the
rooster crowing on a nearby farm. My
“Act of Contrition”- the pattering of raindrops mixed with my tears on the nearby
falls.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I am soaked but clean after my five miles. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">I have a towel in the car to dry off. I face a new day and a new life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-14888484178248331862012-06-01T18:10:00.002-04:002012-06-01T18:10:59.628-04:00A Benny Goes Home<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipkubKT9973zAVsQx4Wo_2m0PZfd9jRWSSn2NoiqrDIV8Hy_1oUKBFb68Lg_1CdBqqNMnDN6-xxdL20BrZtvWxQF5gTLw2oLJ1EJfvg7Uba8mEaMUs63W8217qH2tw0FbMKEefnb1V5PY/s1600/card00796_fr.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="203" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipkubKT9973zAVsQx4Wo_2m0PZfd9jRWSSn2NoiqrDIV8Hy_1oUKBFb68Lg_1CdBqqNMnDN6-xxdL20BrZtvWxQF5gTLw2oLJ1EJfvg7Uba8mEaMUs63W8217qH2tw0FbMKEefnb1V5PY/s320/card00796_fr.jpg" width="320" /></a>I was never a person who used the word “summer’ as a
verb. I heard it used that way the other
day at my daughter’s private school and it made me laugh. Perhaps I observe and
subsequently judge too much. Perhaps
it’s the clientele at that private school. Perhaps I am just too nosy and
overhear too many conversations. Whatever
the reason, the word seemed dated and pretentious just like its speaker's Lily Pulitzer prints and perfectly clean espadrilles. It's funny, but I didn't think Stepford, Connecticut really existed. As the political season heats up though, I wonder.<br />
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Although I have certainly been in the company of many of
people who “summer,” I never quite was comfortable with that sect. With my working class ethnic roots, I was
more of a “going down the shore” kind of gal.
Anyone from New Jersey knows that phrase. It is as prominent in our lexicons as “the
tubes”, “Taylor Ham”, “jimmies”, RC Cola, “rippers” and of course “Bennys”. To those
uninitiated to NJ speak, they are, respectively, the Path Trains to NY, a specific
brand of pork roll, sprinkles on ice cream, a specific brand of cola, deep
fried hot dogs that are cooked until their skin has “ripped,” and the tourists
that frequent the shore in the summer.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
After all these years, I am not sure if I am a Benny or not now.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
According to the website <a href="http://www.bennygohome.com/">www.bennygohome.com</a>
(yes it exists):<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">The term “Benny” is
believed to have come into existence some time in the first half of the 20<sup>th</sup>
century, and was fully entrenched in the local vernacular by the post-war boom of
the fifties. While there is no
consolidated record on the meaning of the name, it is commonly believed to
reflect the places of origin for those frequenting the coastal area. Train luggage tags at this time would have
routinely been stamped with station stops from departure points, with Bayonne,
Elizabeth, Newark and New York being the most common sights. So, it is believed, the term “Benny” emerged
as a universal acronym to describe those originating from places north of the
Raritan River, and especially New York.<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 2.0in; text-indent: .5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">-www.bennygohome.com June 1, 2012<o:p></o:p></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: white; font-family: Tahoma; font-size: 14pt;">in the first half of the 20th century, and was fully
entrenched in the loca</span><br />
I never heard the term “Benny” until my family became
turncoats and actually moved “down the shore” from Northern NJ in 1979. Prior to that we were those tourists from the North. But you switch allegiances pretty quickly when stuck in new found traffic jams just going
to buy milk that you previously walked to the neighborhood A & P for. It became
quite a movement about that time. I have even seen those low flying planes with
beach banners with the phrase “Bennys Go Home.” A derogatory term, yes, but it fades
quickly away by August when the tourist dollars are tallied.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That shore holds a special place for me. Those short weeks
of a small vacation from the hot pavements of urban NJ were incomparable. I have traveled the world from Edinburgh, to the British Virgin Islands, to
New Delhi and even to Korea, but those vacations were like slide shows. True vacations are states of mind and there was nothing like that state nor the minds at the Jersey Shore.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Our arrival was heralded with the crackle of white-walled
car tires on unpaved sandy roads. It announced two to three weeks of: Scorching sand on newly bared feet. Sand flies.
Sunburns that stung well into the night. Peeling noses. Zinc Oxide noses. Murky Atlantic Ocean
water. Flying kites at dusk. Showering
outside in attached dressing rooms. Twilight surfers commanding the two-foot
waves. Sun bleached hair. Jenkinson’s Boardwalk. Seaside. Miniature
golf. The Parking Lot called Route 35. Ladies with reflecting visors and black eye cups sprawled out on plastic beach chairs.
Cute boys who could whip their wet longish hair back with just one quick
turn of their heads. Life guards who wrote the high tide, low tide and ocean temperature
on slate chalkboards on the back of their stands. Several near drowning
episodes that you never told your parents about. Trying to body surf (never
could get the hang of it). Riding the
waves with rafts that only had a half-life of about a week. Beach
umbrellas, towels, beach badges, and other accoutrement you were loaded down
with for the morning trot to the beach, leaving the bivouac for lunch, then hauling everything back at 4:30pm when
grilled dinners were the norm. Never eating on the actual beach. Crabbing in Barnegat Bay. Taking handfuls of sand back with me to the city in canning jars
to savor a bit of the magic throughout the new school year.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It offered rare moments in my childhood summers when I didn’t
watch TV near continuously. Instead we
played board games and were taught poker and gin rummy by my ex-Sailor uncle. My uncle was quite
the gambler and we bet with real money. I suspected he let us win. I wish I remembered some of those lessons. But that old gruff
exterior hid an infinitely patient side as he also took us to the beach at
night to fly his box kite. I never
understood the aerodynamics of a box kite and even now as I Google it, I am amazed
how he got that thing to fly.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My entire family along with two aunts, an uncle and a few of
my father’s cousins thrown-in stayed in that small house. And those bungalows were only two to three bedrooms. Where we all slept, was anyone’s guess. I do remember a family who rented an adjacent
house and had their kids sleep outside. I
thought it was infinitely cool. When I suggested it one year, my mother made
her usual comment “No we are not
cannibals!” It was her answer to what she considered aberrant behavior. She made the same remark when I wanted to get
my ears pierced. I went with my seemingly
cannibalistic aunt instead.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I will be selling my Dad's house near the Jersey Shore soon. I am not sure I will be returning when
sold. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I will be leaving a hell of a lot more than just real estate
when all the papers are signed. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Way too many things to fit into a canning jar.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6946642794555547764.post-79699747819360254692012-05-25T20:37:00.000-04:002012-05-25T20:37:29.541-04:00Mother and Child Reunion<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiga-Nm3rbvl3NPF0fEtYL24hMKmUl7Abm2Jh-UvTHOYFXRKTxIVR80nvQZgT3E-l7TyRB3fr2MZeF41U7wPOE6yGkBvDvdIaZHexFlEDqVPnBftaaXa-C5hL8lulzKYuGLvSd-cNIk0oU/s1600/250px-BrownUniversity-VanWickleGates.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiga-Nm3rbvl3NPF0fEtYL24hMKmUl7Abm2Jh-UvTHOYFXRKTxIVR80nvQZgT3E-l7TyRB3fr2MZeF41U7wPOE6yGkBvDvdIaZHexFlEDqVPnBftaaXa-C5hL8lulzKYuGLvSd-cNIk0oU/s1600/250px-BrownUniversity-VanWickleGates.jpg" /></a><br />
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<!--StartFragment-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
The
mothers are pestering me. It’s a May thing, I guess. No, not mine.
And no, surprisingly not the crazy suburban ones that “man” the carpool
line. And certainly not the overbearing Time magazine
nipple-toting-a-college-freshman types. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It’s
those pesky Alma Maters.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
They
really know how to wear you down. Like real mothers, they have cornered the
market on guilt. Thanks, Moms.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In
the past six months I have been hounded with emails, free Continuing Medical
Education, hints on hotels, free child care, free concerts but surprisingly no
free champagne like they handed out at the actual graduation. And, of course,
hints on donations. Despite all the swag, I will not be going to my 25<sup>th</sup>
Medical School reunion this weekend and doubt I will be attending the 30th
College one next year. Instead I will be co-hosting a local informal
college one this fall. It’s not that I didn’t want to go to the Med School one,
but life has gotten very complicated and it is just not the time. It’s
too bad, too, since I wonder if the old house I lived in on Benevolent and
Brooks street is still standing despite its many negligent student tenants in
the last 25 years.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It's
those physical campuses that I miss most. Both wonderful academic
havens/heavens under old growth trees. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
loved my first real apartment in Providence. It was an
old carved-up Victorian . A probable firetrap, but who really
cared? In your early twenties, you are invincible. Uninsurable too. And
it was cheap. Only $295/month, which included utilities. How I got it, I have
yet to figure out. I have benefitted so infrequently by dumb luck. I
think the housing department took pity on me as I flew out for a weekend and
had exactly 48 hours to land housing. The previous occupant was a sociology
grad student, I remember, who commented disparagingly on how “I almost went to
Chicago but the neighborhood was soooo bad.” It was my first taste of Ivy
League elitism. Nice.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>Please don’t diss one of my ‘hoods, sista.</i><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>But, thank you for the extra keys!</i><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
had the biggest air conditioner the window could hold and despite my concern
for energy conservation, that baby was on continuously for all of those hot and
humid Rhode Island summers. The lights, too, I left on, even when I was
in the library studying, or on-call as a student or my senior year job as a
Surgical Assistant at Rhode Island Hospital or the Miriam Hospital. Such a
rebel.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
had my cat there too. Mr. Cat was my near constant collegiate companion.
Although I have had many cats after him, he will always be remembered for his
grumpy behavior, his disdain for dormitory life and dormitory life's disdain
for him, and of course his love of Chicken McNuggets. No wonder one of his
co-morbid conditions was pancreatitis.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
used to love walking in that old College Hill neighborhood, too. The apartment
was right next to the college radio station. It was great as they
discarded many vinyl “demos” in the large bin in the back. And yes, I
still have them in my LP collection. Down on Brooks to do laundry, down the
hill to the old IGA with my squeaky shopping cart since I didn’t have a car
until I pleaded with my Dad that taking two buses at 5am to get to Pawtucket
alone wasn’t exactly safe. I loved those stately old Victorians perched above
natural stone walls. I loved walking to the old Med School building on
Waterman or to Rhode Island Hospital over the river on cool nights, passing the
amazing smells of a local Portuguese bakery.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
used to love walking in Hyde Park too. Many times I had to, since I missed the
damn shuttle bus. I would always go up 57<sup>th</sup>, then cross over
to Woodlawn where other stately mansions graced the neat streets. I would
cross over to the park on 55<sup>th</sup> and see the many dogs playing in
the field (my favorites were two yellow lab brothers, Bill and Henry), then to
“Monoxide Towers” as an old resident head used to name the twin modern
buildings that bisected the street. Then it was home to a Grand Dame of
an old hotel, a little seedy and smelly with scores of adolescents but still home.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I
will have to visit, or revisit both soon. For real next time- not just in my
head.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Instead
I will focus my sites on an informal local college reunion in the fall.
It will satisfy a certain curiosity that everyone has as people age. Do
the people look the same? Do they act the same? Do they have
interesting careers? Whom did they marry? Did they have kids? <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
And
of course: Are they 500 pounds? I can’t hide my curiosity and I need all the
incentive I can get to exercise and eat right.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Besides,
medical school was a different beast. You didn’t really live with those
people. Sure many of us were on-call together or studied together but you
were older, and more focused. Right. The question I have with many of them is:
Are they still dangerous?<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
So
as I set my sites on the Fall Reunion and miss the festivities “under the elms”
of either College Hill or Hyde Park, I will think fondly of my school days, on
those beautiful campuses, whether it be on the East Side or of the Quads, the
Gothic Architecture or the Early American Brick, libraries open 24 hours a day,
the often odd but forever charming students and old Grand Dame of hotels or a
fire-trap Victorians so long ago.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>the course of a lifetime runs</i><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>over and over again.......</i><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
There
will be other reunions. I am aiming for my fiftieth college in 2033 and med
school in 2037. Time to continue to exercise, eat right and finally lead
a stress-free life.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>It's
only a motion away....</i><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--></div>-Jhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00917064380700586641noreply@blogger.com0